8 Self-Help Books to Improve your Relationships

LADIES might get their monthly relationship advise from fashion magazines, but 88DB recommends these eight self-help books to both sexes. For women, it is definitely more in depth than all the fluffy relationship columns, and for guys, stop thinking it’s embarrassing to read this stuff. You’ll never know until you try.

1. The Seven Levels of Intimacy: The Art of Loving and the Joy of Being Loved by Matthew Kelly
   Kelly begins his book with a statement: Sex is not intimacy. The first half of the book discuss factors that are not considered forms of intimacy. Then proceeds to Kelly’s seven levels of intimacy: facts, opinions, hopes and dreams, feelings, faults, fears and failures, and legitimate needs. It would be a greater impact for you if this book is read with your partner.


2. Weekend Love Coach: How to get the love you want in 48 hours by Lynda Field
   More like a magazine, Weekend Love Coach is written in a friendly tone, and features tips, questionnaires, and even celebrity case studies. Field is Cosmopolitan’s resident Life Coach, so you ladies can be sure to trust her views.


3. The Secret of Staying in Love: Loving Relationships through Communication by John Powell
   This book focuses heavily on how loving yourself would enable you to improve relationships with your partner, family, or friend. Although written by a priest, The Secret of Staying in Love has minimal religious references, and is effortless to read. Powell strongly encourages deep introspection and self-love through his pages, so be ready for an insightful outlook of yourself.


4. Sex & Love for Grownups: A No-Nonsense Guide to a Life of Passion by Sallie Foley
   Written in a Q&A format, Sex & Love for Grownups is humourous, amusing, and fun. Foley assesses relationship problems, then provides a step by step guide to go about solving it. As the title suggests, this book is meant for those in the 40s and up.


5. Addiction To Love: Overcoming Obsession And Dependency in Relationships by Susan Peabody
   A recovering love addict herself, Peabody explores the different situations in which love addicts find themselves in, and presents a recovery program to save yourself from anymore emotional harm. She also reveals this damaging addiction can involve relationships with family members and friends as well.


6. How to Live with a Man... And Love It! by Jennifer Worick
   Unlike all the serious self-help manuals, this retro themed one is more for entertainment purposes rather than serious problem solving. If you don’t read into all the sexist statements and idealistic ideas, this book does provide practical solutions too. Its 50s inspired designs and images is easy on the eyes, which makes it an excellent gift too!


7. Getting the Love You Want: A Guide for Couples by Harville Hendrix
   As a couples counselor, Hendrix’s divorce wounded him awfully, so he started exploring the technical aspects of love through this book. Through interesting case studies depicting the psychology of love and major problems in marriages, Hendrix provides valuable advice as more of a therapist than an author.


8. When You Love A Man Who Loves Himself: How to Deal with a One-Way Relationship by W. Keith Campbell
   So you think you’ve bagged the best looking charmer in town? You might want to give this book a go before you start suffering in the relationship. Campbell identifies the traits of common narcissists, describes how they view their relationships, and reasons why women are so attracted them. This well researched piece also recommends methods for ladies to stay well away from narcissists.